Emily

Shadows

possessed by the shadows

absorb their consciousness

cannot differentiate my thoughts from theirs

brain is polluted by thoughts of the shadows

think i need to do harm

my mind is scattered with words i cannot understand

Show me images of harm done to others

they scream in my ears and whisper words in another language that i cannot understand

memories are implanted by the shadows

they are projections from their world to paint an image they condone

absorb thoughts of consciousness from other people

control me

i must obey their orders

they have a predetermined plan of what i have to do

my body moves wihtout conscious control - i am observer of my life without control

threaten to use me to harm others

feel like images on the news and bad things are threats from the shadow that they will then do harm to loved ones that these are actions from other people who are possessed entirely by the shadows

the shadows within me will soon cause harm to my loved ones

this body does not feel mine

i move without knowledge

it's like watching a film unfold without being able to control it

i cannot trust my perception as truth

the world does not feel real

it's as though it's a projection from the shadows

i see glimmers and flickering that indicate this world is aprojeciton

imprisoned by this flesh

consumption of food empowers and strengthens them

increases their control of me

cause them to insert more thoughts into my head and their actions

no longer have own conscious control of self

empty vessel

don't have own thoughts

they want to gain complete control over me so soon they won't need me as a vessel

parasitic growth inside me

fear that outsiders will perceive the shadows within me

outsiders will want to get rid of the shadows and me

outsiders are conspiring against me

result in harm or humiliation of me

fear i will contaminate outsiders with the shadows

cannot differentiate what was real or implanted by the shadows

little human remains that isn't possessed by the shadows

they want to cause destruction and harm

use me to get to leaders and gain control

use me as a vessel to get to the human world

isolate self so they cannot get to others

fear they will be transferred into other

shadows move through me to other people

feel like i need to protect my brain from the shadows

stop filing my brain with their thoughts

need to stop their absorption into my mind

inhabit objects around me

also inhabit friends or passerbys

fear they inhabit friends

trick me to let down my guard

cause the shadows within me to strengthen

watch me - silhouetted beings

judge me

it's as though they're in another dimension

report my doings to a higher being

make sure i don't disobey them

they watch me

appear as spiders to outsiders

killing self will cause the shadows to fragment and inhabit others

i will be sent to a place filled with shadows

constant second guessing everything

anticipating and fearing the worst

fear and parnaoia

Fear eating

feeding and strengthening the shadows

fill me with more anger and desire to do harm

fat fosters the evil

diminishes the amount of me left

coerces me to do further evil acts

body image

foreign body concept

disgusted by self

don't want male attention

want to shrink down and not exist

don't recognise self refleciton

unworthy/deserving of food/nourishment

form of punishment

passive death

fear poisoned through food

gives the illusion of control

meat

feel i am absorbing the animals consciousness

taking souls

feeding and coinciding with the shadows

taking life is evidence that the shadows are more in control of me and doing evil actions

feel out of control with eating

the shadows force me to consume food without my conscious control or acceptance

fear that I will leave an appliance on and cause harm

reoccuirng sense of imending doom

images of harm done to others

paranoia about leaving appliances on, doors unlocked

fear dogs will escape

appliances will start a fire

i will cause a car accident or harm

worthless

hopeless

deserve to be dead

life is not worth living

difficulty to do menial tasks

lack of motivation to participate in life

desire to hide/hibernate from the world

weak

a burden to others

already feel dead inside - my physical form doesn't follow

empty

defeated

lost

incapable of life

any positive emotion will enrage the shadows

excessive guilt

nothing fees real

i eat, breathe

the shadows keep the little human left in me alive

lost sense of life

disconnected from own body

dissociation

outsider looking on at my life unfold

constantly feeling unsafe

fear others are going to harm me

hyper-vigilant for threat

fear men

avoid situations where i am alone with men or strangers and in crowds

emotions feel scattered

lack of motivation/interest in daily life

trauma implanted shadows within me

disconnected from self and reality